chatarra
All posts tagged "food"
Butchering the Human Carcass for Human Consumption »
“It is VERY IMPORTANT to remember that animals raised for slaughter are kept in tightly controlled environments with their health and diet carefully maintained. Humans are not. Thus not only is the meat of each person of varying quality, but people are also subject to an enormous range of diseases, infections, chemical imbalances, and poisonous bad habits, all typically increasing with age. Also as an animal ages, the meat loses its tenderness, becoming tough and stringy. No farm animal is ever allowed to age for thirty years. Six to thirteen months old is a more common slaughtering point. You will obviously want a youthful but mature physically fit human in apparently good health. A certain amount of fat is desirable as “marbling” to add a juicy, flavorful quality to the meat. We personally prefer firm caucasian females in their early twenties. These are “ripe”. But tastes vary, and it is a very large herd.”
Handy tips from the Church of Euthanasia.
Has the whole vampire thing jumped the shark yet? A new beverage called Blood Energy Potion 48 looks like human blood, and comes in a transfusion bag. The drink tastes like fruit punch and has a “similar nutritional makeup to real blood.” Plus caffeine.
The vampire thing “jumped the shark” somewhere around 1995, but remember: it’s the undead we’re talking about. They keep coming back!
(via)
File:HeuvosRancheros.jpg - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
What I wish I was having for breakfast right now Pendejos.
Koogle: the Kosher search engine »
Dude, I just love these guys from The Onio… wait, it’s REAL.
“A censored search engine called Koogle enables devout Jews to search the Internet without fear of running into objectionable material, such as photos of women or bacon. It also blocks users from buying anything online on the Jewish Sabbath. The site has Hebrew and English versions.”
Bonus detail: look carefully what’s on top of Koogle’s logo. Insane!
(via The Ragbag)
Fuck yeah!
An Italian company unveiled today a pizza vending machine. But unlike the American variants, which heat a frozen pizza, the “Let’s Pizza” machine makes pizza from scratch, mixing and kneading the dough, spinning into a pizza shape, and adding sauce and toppings. It’s then baked right there in the vending machine — all in three minutes. The machines are planned to appear throughout Europe and the United States.
(via)
Virgin: the world's best passenger complaint letter? »
So lets peel back the tin-foil on the main dish and see what’s on offer.
I’ll try and explain how this felt. Imagine being a twelve year old boy Richard. Now imagine it’s Christmas morning and you’re sat their with your final present to open. It’s a big one, and you know what it is. It’s that Goodmans stereo you picked out the catalogue and wrote to Santa about.
Only you open the present and it’s not in there. It’s your hamster Richard. It’s your hamster in the box and it’s not breathing.
Instant fucking classic.
Recession: McDonald's Is Lovin' It »
Pobres yanquis, cómo se nota que no conocen Mercadona.
Because fast food is cheaper than classier restaurant fare, and sometimes cheaper than eating at home, too.
Holland Township family angry that supermarket won't personalize cake for their son
JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell and Adolf Hitler Campbell. Good names for a trio of toddlers? Heath and Deborah Campbell think so. The Holland Township couple has picked those names and the oldest child, Adolf Hitler Campbell, turns 3 today.
This has given rise to a problem, because the ShopRite supermarket in Greenwich Township has refused to make a cake for young Adolf’s birthday.
(via Ingram)
Random Wikipedia facts: English cuisine
“During the Middle Ages, English cuisine enjoyed an excellent reputation, its decline can be firmly traced back to the move away from the land and increasing urbanisation of the populace during the Industrial Revolution. Britain became a net importer of food. British food also suffered heavily from effects of rationing during two World Wars (rationing finally ended in 1954), followed by the increasing trend toward industrialised mass production of food. However, in Britain today there is more interest in food than there has ever been before, with celebrity chefs leading the drive toward raising the standard of food in the UK.”
